Sydney - Mama Sylvie's "Garden" Angel
Sylvie Stephens continues to drink in every day God gives her with Sydney:
I thank God for another day that I feel alive and positive and full of joy, and I have no distractions to keep me from celebrating and enjoying Sydney. I could be sobbing in a corner rocking back and forth, but instead I am filled with peace! It’s a miracle.
Yesterday I bought more outfits and decorations for Sydney’s birthday party. She will be 6 months old on Monday, September 14th, and I want her to have a party. My heart was racing the whole time I was away from the hospital, but I did it. She is going to have a garden party!
In the back of my mind, I am always afraid of how I will feel after she is gone. This is what I came up with yesterday that I want to share. I can’t fall apart after Sydney is gone. I worry I have been so strong thus far because she is here and she needs me. But after she is gone, I still need to live for her. I can’t let her be the reason I fall apart. She can’t be the reason, and will not be the reason, for anything negative.
This does not mean that I am not allowed to be devastated, depressed and heartbroken for a really long time. But even if it is for 5 minutes a day, I need to stand up. I need to stand up and breathe, I need to stand up and LIVE. FOR HER. And there will be a time when I will remember her with more joy than sorrow. I will ALWAYS feel lucky to have had her, no matter how brief her time was with me. “I would rather have 3 minutes of wonderful than a lifetime of nothing special.”
[Sydney has scimitar syndrome. She is receiving palliative care at Children's Hospital in Minnesota.]
See also: Pray for Sydney, Update, God will give me the strength…, Nurse Angels, I can’t kiss her enough, He will help me heal.
Tags: Scimitar Syndrome, Sylvie Stephens
