Introducing “Ask Sylvie.”

Sylvie Stephens spends precious time with her daughter, Sydney.

Sylvie Stephens’ journey with her daughter, Sydney, has been such an inspiration to me. When it became clear that Sydney was heaven bound, God’s grace took over and gave Sylvie the strength to fill her sweet girl’s days with love and happiness.

Sylvie is not the first nor will she be the last parent whose time on earth with a beloved child is brief. It occurred to me that God has blessed Sylvie with a generous spirit and a willingness to help others who are going through a frightening health trial with a child.  She has agreed to write an occasional article and answer questions for Nathan’s Prayer.  I had an opportunity to ask her a few questions.

Karen:  Sylvie, so many people have read about your journey with Sydney, your beautiful baby girl who lost her battle with a congenital heart defect last September.  Tell me a little background information about yourself.

Sylvie:  I spent six months with my daughter at Children’s Hospital in Minneapolis, constantly surrounded by medical professionals and God’s presence.  I witnessed her care and procedures, read her charts, familiarized myself with vital signs, metrics and medical terminology.  I work as an engineer.  What medical knowledge I picked up during those six months was absorbed through the experience (never through my own research).  I grasped what I could in the medical sense, and prayed for understanding of the rest.  Faith filled in the gap.

Karen:  For many people going through a health trial with a child, their faith is focused only on God allowing their child to live, not giving them courage to deal with death if that’s God’s will.  How did your faith and your walk with God evolve as you realized your time with Sydney was limited?

Sylvie: I remember always praying for God to hold her in His arms when I could not before falling asleep.  I began my prayers like this when I was in the NICU parent sleep room when she was very little, just days old.  What I meant by my prayer was that I wanted her to feel wrapped in love when I, the person that loves her most, could not physically be with her.  At first, there was a fear in my heart as I would say this prayer.  I would cry in agony and would want to take the prayer back when I realized my prayer may be answered- she would be in God’s arms, but not in mine ever again.  But, with the grace of God, I realized a mother’s resolve:  what was best for my Sydney, not best for me.  The ultimate sacrifice.  I grew to accept that the best life for Sydney could not be materialized in this world.  Coming to terms with that was the first step, letting her go was another, and was much more difficult.

Karen:  Thanks, Sylvie, for sharing your journey.

If you haven’t read previous posts about Sylvie and Sydney, here are a few:  Pray for Sydney, August Update, Strength, Nurse Angels, Kisses, Letting Go, Birthday, and A Better Place.

Sylvie welcomes your questions about parenting and loving a child with a congenital heart defect.  Send your questions either by commenting to this post or by email (see “contact” at the top of this page).

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Tags: Congenital Heart Defects, Nathan's Prayer, Sylvie Stephens